Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Ginger Ale Fail

Let me tell you something...I hate lots of things. Yah, I drink the haterade when it comes to things like meatless chili, vegans, chain wallets, in-flight sombreros, all other airlines, children between the ages of 2-21, Hawaiian print anything, stuffed animals toted by adults, Canadians, thumb rings, blue tooth headsets, Ed Hardy, & velvet....but working on airplanes has added something additional to this list...

Ginger fucking ale.

I just don't get it. Nobody drinks ginger ale at home. No one. Unless you're having a party and need the stuff for a mixer, I challenge you to name one person you know who keeps a stock of ginger ale at home in the fridge. You do not come home after a long days work, sit back in the recliner and say, "Man, I could sure go for a ginger ale right now."

So why do you do it on planes? It's weird to me. What is it about being at altitude that triggers this craving? And no, it's usually not due to nausea or airsickness. It's not. You know you've ordered it.  I'm constantly taking this poll amongst my friends about what they tend to order and ginger ale always comes up first. I don't know why it angers me to such a murderous rage, but every time the snowball effect of ginger ale orders starts to cascade down the rows, I loose my shit and envision the shake n' spray in the offenders face. I realize this is ridiculous and an over-reaction. Again, I don't know why it effects me so but it just does. I would have no problem serving it to you if you could prove it's a normal, consistent beverage choice in your daily life while on ground, in your car, or in any other mode of transportation.

I know I've got you. I'm right. You've never really thought about it until now. So if you notice your trolley dolly make a face or growl or spit while you've just ordered said beverage, think about the choice you just made. Your safe bet is to always, always order nothing.

17 comments:

  1. This is so funny, I've actually just started asking people on the plane if they drink Ginger Ale in real life and they're always like, "oh, well, no I guess I don't!" NO ONE can explain why they are ordering it! And at this point I've asked people on prob my last 10 flights because I just can't get over it, I feel ya girl! hahaha

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  2. Lol, I love that you ask that...one of those life mysteries that we'll never know...

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  3. I dunno about those guys, but I love ginger ale, I don't keep a stock of it in my fridge (since I don't drink pop that often), but it's generally my drink of choice when it comes to soda.

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  4. We ask for it because it's there!

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  5. What about Bloody Mary Mix. Who drinks THAT at home?

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  6. Ginger Ale doesn't have caffeine, it's not as heavy as a cola, and it's not nearly as overly-sweet as Sprite or 7-Up. Yes, I do drink it at home.

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  7. I ask for ginger ale because I've stashed a shit ton of airline whiskey bottles in my carry-on and if I don't maintain a good buzz through the entire flight, I'll end up an anxious, shaky pile of flight-phobic wimp, which no one really wants. And yes, I drink a lot of whiskey gingers at home, so my fridge is always stocked with it.

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  8. Well, my dad had a case of ginger ale in his fridge right now, but that's beside the point because you're absolutely right. And the save goes for tomato juice. Who drinks that at home, and how the f do they know it.s available on the flight?

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  9. For me, ginger ale on an airplane is purely nostalgic. As a kid, the first time I had ever seen or heard of it was on an airplane with its official-looking can that promised "ale". For the longest time, I didn't even know it was available in stores. I thought it was a special treat just for fliers. I definitely drink more now (as a mixer) but I still remember it fondly.

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  10. I order ginger ale and do have a stash at home. But then I'm also a vegetarian, so I still fail?

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  11. Ginger ale helps a queasy stomach. Perhaps you should stock it so one of your dumbass customers doesn't barf on your shoes.

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  12. :( But I love you, and I'm Canadian. Sigh...that stung.

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  13. Ginger is a known cure for seasickness, airsickness, carsickness, etc. I will admit that I listened to you on TBTL and you sounded really mean and bitter, but I also heard your apology to Jen, and so I suspect you're totally nice and just trying to make your job livable by poking fun. Most of us passengers are trying to do the best we can (I was a waitress for awhile, and that made me inclined to hate people, too)

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  14. Yeah maybe I don't tell you I'm on the verge of puking, but I am. Ginger ale gets me by. Medication doesn't work. Maybe if you all weren't faking turbulence I wouldn't need it. Thanks.

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  15. Good tip! I'll ask for ginger ale the next time for sure! I'm positive I've seen glowers for ginger ale though and a few for tomato juice. Ask for nothing indeed! Cabin air makes me die of thirst, specially on the transatlantics! The beverage cart is a life saver and I HATE coke and pepsi so I just mumble 'orange juice no ice please' and usually everyone else begins to get that...

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  16. I order Ginger Ale on flights because I see it on the cart and mostly forget it exists anywhere but on airplanes. Don't hate me.

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  17. We frequently drink it in our home, the only carbonated beverage we drink. You complain an awful lot. Sounds to me you are the one who needs to get laid or take that laxative. Life is too short to have such nasty thoughts.

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