Sunday, February 27, 2011

What is?...Electronic Devices for 200 please.

Pet Peeve. When a flight attendant lists off various types of electronic devices and their respective brand names to be turned off in order to secure the cabin.


I know when you fly as much as we space waitresses do, it may seem as if 99.9% of the flying public suffers from Fetal Alcohol Syndrome or 16 & Pregnant Disease...I may be reaching here but I still think they all know what an electronic device is. They may choose not to follow instructions but I really would like to believe that they can distinguish between an actual paper-paged book versus a Kindle. I can't stand it when the announcement goes like something as follows: "Ladies & Gentlemen, in order for us to close the forward aircraft door, please turn off your iPods, iPads, iPhones, Blackberry's, Blueberries, Raspberries, Kindles, Droids, Boise headsets, Gameboy's, DVD players, etc, etc, etc...."

We get it. You like to hear yourself over the PA. You're trying to be cute with different berry names. Aw. How Southwest of you...One of my favsies in particular is this one FA who says droid like 'DRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDD', like in the commercial. Yah.

So just stop. Put down the PA. Follow the script. No one is listening anyway. Ad lib elsewhere and get creative with things that how can we fuck with the uniform policy just enough to get people talking but still remain in complete compliance with the manual. One of my favorite drunk brainstorming activites as of late...